To Watch from the Side
by takoyakilover4ever
Summary: As Lucy and Natsu are in their final year of High school, the two start to think about their future and the many possibilities. The two have a secret kept from one another; they love each other. Even though they clearly want to have a deeper relationship; neither of them want to say anything. The two are afraid of ruining their relationship. They will just watch from the side. NaLu
1. Chapter 1: Those Words

_**Chapter 1: Those words**_

I love you.

Who knew that saying those simple words that it would hurt so much? I haven't even said them out loud yet, but when I think about it... It just hurts to think about it. Your smile. Your kindness. I've told you, "You're too kind". Though you responded, "I'm really not..."

I want to fall in love with you but it hurts too much to do so. I want to tell you, "I love you". I'll just watch from the side.

* * *

Waking up, Lucy slams her her finger onto her smartphone, rapidly pressing the screen and hoping to press the 'snooze' button. Scratching her head, the high-school girl throws the blanket off her body and moves her legs towards the edge of the bed. Her long blonde hair falls elegantly behind her back, tracing the shape of her body. Lucy opens her warm chocolate eyes and blinks a few times.

After refreshing herself by taking a bath, Lucy dresses up slowly and drys her damp hair. She runs her fingers through her hair after combing it, feeling the long silky locks between her fingers. After buttoning up the white shirt and pulling her navy blue skirt up, Lucy wraps the matching coloured tie around the collar of her shirt and tightens it. She throws her blazer on, dusting it off. Lucy leaves her hair down and slips her thigh high socks around her slender legs slowly and slips her brown shoes on.

After staring at her dull face in the morning, Lucy slaps her face and puts on the largest smile she can muster. She closes the door to her empty house and walks slowly towards school; her school bag on her right shoulder. Smiling and enjoying the breeze, Lucy uses her finger to move the hair away from her face as she walks.

"Lucy!" Hearing an overly energetic voice, Lucy whips her head around to see that a boy is running up to her in full speed. She smiles in response and waves to him kindly. Before Lucy can react, Natsu slings himself onto her shoulders and rubs his head against her chin.

"I've missed you!" Natsu continues to display his affection towards her and lets go, "Let's walk together to class!"

Lucy nods her head, ignoring the pain in her heart and walks with Natsu, "We have Chemistry first; did you do the homework?"

The colour from Natsu's face drains as he looks at Lucy in despair, "I'M SO DEAD! I DID NOT DO THE HOMEWORK!"

Giggling at his reaction, Lucy pulls out a piece of paper from her bag and unfolds it while handing it to Natsu, "I thought you were going to say that; I already made copies of the answers for you."

The two continue their light hearted chats, enjoying the company of each other.

* * *

'We met in middle school. It was purely by chance. He was in my english class and the both of us just ended up completely getting along. After three years, we still hang out together. the two of us are best friends now and hang out all the time as friends. I know it's selfish but sometimes I want to be more than friends'.

* * *

 _During Break..._

As Natsu continues to messily eat his bread for snack, Gray looks at him in confusion. The two rivals, though are best friends, wait outside their next class together. Gray watches Natsu as his eyes trail off to look at Lucy, who is walking together Levy and Wendy. His gaze doesn't leave her form until she turns the corner and leaves his view.

"Seriously though... Why don't you just date Lucy" Gray inquires Natsu, giving him raised eyebrow look, "You're pretty close to her and many other guys want to date her."

Finishing his bread, Natsu's hair covers his eyes, "You don't get it... Why would I ruin our relationship like that? We are in a comfortable position to just chat and be friends." Natsu throws the plastic of his bread away. He then grins at Gray as the plastic falls into the bin without falling to the floor.

Gray sighs, "You're such an idiot... What if I started dating her?" Gray looks at Natsu, giving him an evil look.

Natsu turns away from Gray, "Do whatever you want... It's not my business who she dates." Natsu then remembers the past; Lucy's look of despair in her past relationships, "I don't even know that much about her."

"You're a coward..." Gray mocks Natsu, making the short tempered guy swing his fist at him.

"Shut up you ice princess!". As the two continue to fight, the other students watch and just sigh from this normal everyday display.

* * *

 _Afterschool..._

Lucy, walking home with Natsu, she turns her head and continues to listen to Natsu on how he 'defeated' Gray today. Lucy giggles and responds appropriately. The two of them continue to walk with their voices surrounding the air around them. The small breeze of the August month carries their hair, making it flutter slightly.

"Thank you for walking me back as usual Natsu," Lucy closes the door to her house and smiles kindly at him, "As usual, be careful on your way home."

Natsu gives his signature grin and waves goodbye to the blonde girl. He runs off to his house thinking, 'I still don't know what she are going to do after university. With her grades, she could probably go overseas and study there. She would then meet some guy and marry him, forgetting all about me. I don't want that!'

Opening his door to his house, Natsu greets his mother and slams himself onto his bed, 'Why didn't I just ask her out earlier? It now has to be so complicated...'. Natsu runs his hand through his short strands of salmon hair, thinking about Lucy's face all throughout the night. He places the back of his hand onto his head as he dresses into more comfortable clothes. He leans against the wall and looks at his phone, wanting to text Lucy. He then decides not to and goes off to play games on his computer.

* * *

Looking at her phone, Lucy scroll down to look at Natsu and her last conversation. It was something random, but she enjoys receiving the buzz of a text from him. Laying her head onto her notes, Lucy lays her head down onto her desk as she stops studying for school and thinks about Natsu. Her long hair falls onto her face as Lucy sighs heavily. She fantasies about the different possibilities of their relationship, her mind wandering continuously until she gets frustrated and forces herself to stop thinking about it.

She raises her head, her hand trailing to a framed picture she has of the two of them right next to her family photo. She traces her right index finger over the smiling face of Natsu in the photo. She smiles sadly and throws herself onto her bed.

During the night, the two toss and turn. The two think and sigh, 'Last year of highschool... Should I risk it?'.

* * *

I love you

Are you willing to risk an entire relationship built on friendship to say these words?

* * *

A/N: This story might be relatable to a few as this is story is created from real life experiences. If they are mine or someone else's experience is something I won't reveal. Ruining a relationship is always risky.

Please review your opinions.


	2. Chapter 2: Despite Everything

_**Chapter 2: Despite everything**_

Though despite everything, you continue to stay by my side. Even though I love you, it hurts to try and risk this precious relationship. Despite everyone telling me to confess already, I don't have the courage to risk everything that I have built up to this point. I'm just a coward.

So I'll just watch from the side, admiring your perfect self until I'm brave enough to say, "I love you".

* * *

'Wake up. Walk to school. Study for Exams. A repetitive cycle of a normal high school life, repeating over and over until the eventual graduation day. Do I really want things to stay this way though?' Lucy thinks as she continues to write down notes in the library during the lunch time period. Sighing deeply, Lucy closes her biology textbook while tracing her eyes all over her papers. Her fingers trail downwards on the paper, examining the elegantly written notes.

"As expected of an honor student... Studying for exams that are months away" A voice silky to Lucy's ears tingle her mind. She turns to see Natsu's wide grin spread across his face as he looks into her eyes. A small blush plasters itself across Lucy's face as his face inches closer to her face until he reaches the side of her ear. He whispers happily, "You should really take a break from once in a while; you're gonna stress yourself out."

Twiddling her fingers, Lucy fiddles with her thumbs as her hands are intertwined with one another as she pouts at Natsu, "How about you? You should be taking your final year more seriously." Sighing, Lucy whispers back to Natsu, not wanting to disturb the others, "Let's talk outside so we don't disturb the others in the library.

Natsu, grinning widely, walks happily with Lucy as they exit the library. He smiles widely at her as they go towards the grassy field, which was for sports, located at the back of their school buildings. They decide to sit in the shade on a bench; the two enjoying the area surrounding them. Ringing in their ears were the sounds of different students playing football together, along with a few voices of random chatter.

Lucy places her books down beside her, taking out her homemade lunch box and deciding to eat it. She eats in silence, listening to whatever Natsu's talking about, which was most likely about Gray and his rivalry or the games that he plays.

Natsu then goes silent for a second, staring into Lucy's eyes which causes her to shift uncomfortably in her spot, "W..What it is Natsu?". Lucy rubs her face to check if any rice is stuck on her cheek.

Laughing, Natsu inches closer to Lucy and grins while saying, "Can I have some? I ate lunch already but that looks yummy". Natsu rocks back and forth waiting for Lucy's answer, anticipating for a 'yes' reply from her. Lucy, using her chopsticks, picks up a piece of scrambled egg and raises it to his mouth. He happily accepts the offer by taking the entire egg into his mouth and eating it whole.

"So what are you going to do after high school Natsu? Are you planning on going to university?" Lucy, finishing her lunch, packs away her empty box and gently asks Natsu this serious question, knowing that he isn't comfortable with these situations. Silence fills the air after Lucy asks that question; the only thing surrounding them was the light breeze that was causing their hair to gently dance around the small gusts of wind. An etched smile does not leave either of their faces; pure tranquility and satisfaction is what the two feel. The feeling of being comfortable around each other; it's an indescribable emotion.

"I know that many people don't think I can go to university... But I really want to go and study for the profession I want to do," Natsu's eyes gleam with passion, "I told you before on how I admired the police and detectives right?"

Lucy nods her head, remembering how Natsu said a few years ago that he really wanted to become someone the people would rely on.

"I finally decided that I want to do exactly that..." Natsu whispers while lowering his head; his hair covering his eyes just slightly, "... Maybe I can stop people from experiencing what happened to my father."

Lucy doesn't say anything but places her hand near Natsu's, which was laying down on the bench. The two inch closer together, though no too close. There is space between shoulders; no body contact is made. The only contact are their hands pinkies almost intertwining with one another. However, as the two know that they aren't in a romantic relationship, Natsu and Lucy keep their hands separate.

'A murder without a purpose... Why should a person like you Natsu suffer such cruel fate?' Lucy thinks to herself, letting her mind sprawl out.

Breaking the tension, Natsu grins at Lucy asking her, "So what about you? Have you finally made a decision?".

Almost ashamed of herself, Lucy drops her head and shakes it, "I don't know... Nothing is really interesting. I took hard subjects like Chemistry, Biology and Psychology to challenge myself. Though nothing has turned up." The blonde starts to fidget with the buttons of her shirt, pulling and tugging on it, "I wish there was something I could be interested in."

Natsu shoots up from the bench, shocking Lucy just slightly, shouting, "Let's go out today Lucy! You have to clear your mind!"

"Where are we going to go?" Lucy inquires.

"The mall? I don't know! Let's get some food and then just wander around the mall for a bit.

* * *

 _Afterschool..._

As soon as school ends, Natsu takes Lucy by the arm, dragging her out of the school campus. He continues to spoil Lucy, treating her (despite her protests) and showing her how much of a good friend can be. After around 3 hours of just wandering randomly without a purpose or aim in mind, Lucy stops walking and smiles at Natsu.

"Thank you... You really are kind." Lucy happily beams at Natsu, causing him to internally squeal at this display.

Natsu flicks her forehead and smirks, "Don't overthink things too much. I'm always here to talk."

The two continue to walk home together, enjoying the warm rays of the sun together.

As Lucy waves goodbye to Natsu and closes the door to her house, She leans against the wall with tears running down her face. Looking into her family photos on the living room wall, the pain in her heart tightens even more. She continues to sob silently into her arm thinking, 'I'm a horrible friend... Why do I have to be in love with the one true friend I have?'.

* * *

Unknown to them, Gray spots them from one of the restaurants and huffs in annoyance, 'Just go out already... I'll take her from you as a punishment if you don't hurry...'. He thinks the kindness Lucy has shown him in the past and closes his eyes, trying to push away these feelings.

* * *

Despite everything, I will continue to push my feelings away

I don't have the right to say those words

I love you

I'm just going to wait, watching from the side

 _ **End of Chapter 2**_

* * *

A/N: Updates may be a bit irregular as I have a very important event coming up soon. I'm sorry for the short author note; I don't know what to say.

Please review your opinions


	3. Chapter 3: Selfish

_Chapter 3 - Selfish_

Even though you probably feel different, or nothing at all, you continue to show me that smile. Though sometimes that smile is not pointed towards me, maybe it is for someone more special than me. Even though I clearly don't deserve you, I want to keep that smile to myself. I don't deserve to be selfish.

However, I'll continue to watch from the side, watching your happiness from afar. Even though I want your happiness to revolve around me. One day I might be selfish and tell you, "I love you".

* * *

Lucy, who is currently walking towards the canteen to eat lunch by taking the outdoor route (a path along the side of the building), bumps into Gray along her journey. The two stare into each others eyes for a second before a conversation can arise from either one of them. The two then giggle at the sudden awkwardness, releasing the tension between them. Gray admires Lucy for a second; he looks at the way her eyes blink with her eyelashes letting a small minuscule shadow on the tip of her cheeks. He watches her hair flutter in the small breeze; her long locks being elegantly being picked up.

Lucy tilts her head to the side, relaxing her body posture by lowering herself slightly while looking up at Gray, "So where are you headed to?".

Turning his head slowly, Gray moves his gaze to look at Lucy, "Well I was on my way to the shaded area since no one usually hangs out there."

"Hmm... Why do you want to be alone?" Lucy then continues to beam brightly at him, smiling kindly, "Don't you have friends?"

"Of course I have friends! I just wanted to study for something..." Gray replies, crossing his arms, "Why don't you join me?"

Placing her right index finger onto the tip of her chin, Lucy takes her phone out, "Yeah! Can Natsu join us?".

Nodding his head, Gray scratches the back of his neck while looking towards the field.

Gray sighs at the name of Natsu, knowing that Lucy has an infatuation with the guy that obviously likes her. He watches as she excitedly though, trying to hide it, mashes the screen of her phone. He watches as she texts Natsu, asking him if he is busy. Her face flushes slightly as she gets a reply, meaning that Natsu will be there.

* * *

Sitting together under the umbrella covering the umbrella, the three continue to chat normally to each other; their conversation not having a serious tone or any meaning behind them. It was soothing, the cool air revolving around them while a breeze flutters. They continue to talk, though Natsu and Gray continue to fight and discuss who is better out of the both of them. Even though their purpose was to study, they got nothing done.

As they continue to talk randomly, Natsu's gaze never leaves Lucy's eyes. His stare would lock onto her face, admiring the many different qualities of her. If Lucy was not so distracted with the conversation they were having, she definitely would have notices the look Natsu was giving her. It was a look of someone deeply in love.

Lucy continues to laugh at the two arguing about something random, until she looks at her phone. Her eyes widen as she realises that they only have 2 minutes to get to class.

Pulling on Natsu's wrist, Lucy gives him a panicked look, "We're going to be late!". Natsu shrugs and giggles at Lucy panicking.

The three friends say goodbye and turn to go their separate ways. Natsu and Lucy go together as they are in the same class.

Before Lucy leaves, Gray speaks up and looks at her.

"Lucy do you mind meeting me afterschool?" Gray asks politely, hoping she would say yes.

"Sure!" Lucy waves goodbye to Gray, walking off with Natsu towards their Chemistry lesson. Natsu, looking behind to see Gray, glares at him then turns back to look at Lucy.

* * *

Panting heavily, Natsu and Lucy crash into their classroom, which was a lab, apologising in between breaths. Their chemistry teacher rolls their eyes and orders them to sit down and read the practical sheet for their upcoming experiment.

The two sit down at the back, and read the paper. Lucy scribbles down notes that she needs to remind herself of on the practical instruction sheet. While their teacher allows them to take time to digest and understand the experiment, Natsu and Lucy go off topic and talk about more random occurrence.

Lucy sneezes lightly, causing Natsu to laugh slightly. He grins at her saying, "It's almost going to be the winter season huh? Do you want to celebrate christmas with me again?"

"Hmm... Maybe... I don't want to intrude on your family though..." Lucy says while blowing her nose into a tissue.

Pulling on his scarf, Natsu shuffles while leaning towards Lucy, "Just give it some thought, okay?"

The two blush lightly at the physical contact. Lucy nods and listens to the teacher as they explain the experiment.

* * *

 _Afterschool..._

Spotting Gray, Lucy runs towards him and pats him on the back, "Hey!".

The two continue to talk to one another as Gray walks her along the path towards her house. Lucy notices the way that Gray looks at her; it was full of compassion and admiration.

Reaching her house, Lucy thanks Gray for walking her home and smiles brightly at him. He notices her face; how it's not plastered with heavy amounts of makeup. Her mouth bent upwards, giving a perfect smile which was embroidered on her face. Lucy's hair dancing along with the small breeze.

"Lucy..." Gray raises his hand up to Lucy's cheek, embracing the warmth of her flushed face, "Never mind... It's nothing." Gray turns around, regretting his actions to what he did with Lucy, thinking about his consequences.

The blonde girl watches Gray as he turns his back to her, walking away. Knowing from the signs given to Lucy, she looks down at the floor understanding Gray's true feelings.

Whipping her head around, Lucy's eyes lock onto onyx coloured eyes, their gaze piercing into her eyes.

"Natsu... What do I do?"

* * *

And so, I will continue to stay quiet about this feeling

I want to be selfish

I want to keep you for myself

Though, I will just watch from the side

 _End of Chapter 3_

* * *

A/N: Sorry for the late update. I have many things going on with life. This chapter focused on Gray. Also, the person who is watching from the side, I shall not reveal who they are until mid-story.

Please review your opinions.


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